I had no idea Marty Brodeur was Jewish, no less a Mohel but after watching him try to involuntarily circumcise Sean Avery last night, it begs the question.

This morning Gary Bettman goes on WFAN and tells Boomer and Carton that Avery will be warned about taking liberties with poor, little, defenseless Marty Brodeur. Gary should look at the slow-mo of the altercation. If he did, he’d see that Brodeur exacerbated the hostility between himself and Mr. Avery by lifting his goal stick between Avery’s legs in an attempt to injure his manhood. But, since Gary is such shmekl, he wouldn’t know from manhood.

Not being a guy, I have no idea how a whack to the wedding tackle feels. But, I’ll bet Avery was incensed about having a potential “equipment problem” at the hands of a man whose children don’t know if he is their Uncle or their Daddy. Oh, the disappointed starlets, the disappointed puckbunnies, oh, the humanity! I’m surprised Avery exhibited the restraint he did. It’s a wonder he didn’t “Simonize” Marty with a two hand right then and there. 

But no, Avery is the villain here for waving his stick in front of Marty.  Avery is wrong for standing in front of Marty, thereby screening him. Avery is wrong for scoring a goal on the omniscient Martin Brodeur.  Marty can use his stick on Avery and trip him from behind and Avery will get called for goaltender interference.

Some Ranger fans out there are all  over Avery’s case today for getting called for phantom  penalties against Marty Brodeur. Gary Bettman and the league are going to warn Avery about his outrageous behavior against Marty. Sean Avery is a saint compared to a cheap actor like Marty Brodeur. Sean Avery is in Marty’s head and let’s hope he remains there.

When push comes to shove, after another disgraceful display of piss poor officiating last night, Glen Sather should find Terry Gregson and give him a louder ear bashing then Lamarillo did on Friday. Perhaps the next set of eunuchs that officiate the game on Wednesday will tilt the ice back in favor of the Rangers. Personally, I would settle for a game that is called fair and square and not have the outcome determined by the officials.

PS Kudos to Mitch “The Tummler” Beck for pointing out Brodeur’s attempted bris on Avery.

Posted under New York Rangers